5 Reasons Why People Love to Hate On Kanye West

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Most celebrities are on some level, deeply annoying. They exist in their weird little bubble of fame, the real world outside long forgotten. This detachment leads to ridiculous opinions, inflamed egos, and misguided decisions. Like adopting a child of every race in a desperate bid to appear altruistic or creating an art exhibit consistently solely of yourself sitting in an empty room wearing a brown paper bag. They're all assholes really. Few, however, provoke anger like Kanye West.Kanye is the man who sets the internet on fire with screaming, badly worded declarations of hate directed against his gargantuan and apparently uncontrollable ego. But what is it exactly about Kanye that inspires so much raw hatred in the first place?

1) He's A Sore Loser (on Beyonce's Behalf)

Remember when a nineteen year-old Taylor Swift became the first country music artist in history to win an MTV Video Music Award? Of course you don't, because we only remember what happened afterwards. Kanye West approached the stage, grabbed the microphone from Taylor and announced to the crowd that no, the judges had actually got it wrong. Beyonce's music video was in fact, far superior to Taylor's and should've rightfully won the award, according to the unquestionable judgment of Kanye. Poor little Taylor was shocked into silence and Beyonce presumably mortified. Kanye confidently left the stage, knowing he had righted a terrible injustice that night. After the resulting internet furor and the goddamn president of the United States calling him a "jackass," Kanye learnt his lesson and never did anything like that again.

Oh.

Except when Beck stood on stage to accept his 2015 Grammy for Best Album, Kanye appeared beside him to once again correct the judge's mistake. Appearing to lose his nerve at the last moment however, he stepped down to let Beck enjoy his moment alone. Later he told reporters that Beck winning the award over Beyonce was "disrespectful to inspiration" and that "if they want real artists to come back, they need to stop playing with us." Let it be known that "fake artist" Beck is a singer, songwriter, producer and instrumentalist who can play no less than fourteen instruments.

2) He Has A Messiah Complex

In 2006 Kanye posed on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine as Jesus Christ, influential figure to many and morbid wall ornament to millions worldwide. As a believer himself, surely Kanye is well aware of the potential offensiveness of this lofty comparison. Let's not forget, however, that by gracing us with his holy presence onstage, he is sacrificing himself in some way. "I’m just giving of my body on stage...I'm putting my life at risk. This is like being a police officer or war or something."

When not directly comparing himself to the son of God, Kanye is declaring himself to be a straight-out genius. "For me to say I wasn't a genius, I would just be lying to you and myself." Quotes like this are incredibly common from Kanye but never seem to be enforced by others, meaning nobody else knows he's a genius. Clearly, the man is unappreciated in his own time. Years from now the world will look back at the catchy hip-hop tunes and sneakers that look like Lego man feet, wondering how we could be so blind to the visionary in our midst.

Genius.

In 2009, Kanye declared to the world that he now wished to be known as "Martin Louis the King Jr." Somehow, the catchy nickname failed to stick and Kanye decided to forget his dream of civil rights activism, quietly going back to "West," perhaps only so he could name his unfortunate daughter "North." North. West. North West. Get it? It's like the direction.

3) He's A Conspiracy Theorist

During the 2005 Live 8 concert tour, an event dedicated to spreading AIDS awareness and gathering funds, Kanye decided to divulge the secret to where AIDS really came from. According to the eternal wisdom of Kanye, AIDS is a "man-made disease" that was "placed in Africa just like crack was placed in the black community to break up the Black Panthers." Kanye has repeated this claim multiple times and even helpfully recorded it in his song lyrics, for those who missed his live announcement. By spreading terrifyingly stupid rumors about the American government's apparent capacity for mass murder, Kanye is providing mass-market celebrity-endorsed fuel for the great conspiracy fire of the 911 truthers, the anti-vaxxers, the birthers and every other tinfoil hat-wearing inbred trying to expose the underground lizard people that rule our government. Cheers for that Kanye.

4) His Caps Lock Key Is Broken

ALL CAPS. ALL the time. Kanye writes like an adolescent boy riddled with anxiety about the size of his genitalia and needs the world to know he's a big man. After all, even his LETTERS are big. This guy must be a big deal. And don't forget the exclamation marks!!!!!!

Can you hear him shout? Or perhaps it's just a simplistic marketing technique. Kanye understands that the internet is an infinite, swarming hive of words all scrambling to make their way to the top and the only way to get them noticed is to MAKE THEM REALLY BIG!!!!! That way, everyone knows you're really big too. See? He totally is a genius.

5) He's A Professional Troll

Ok, let's think about it for a second. Realistically. Do you really believe that anybody with such a rampant, uncontrolled and borderline insane ego could become successful to the degree Kanye has, in the variety of fields he has? Because Kanye West is an undeniably successful man and it's not by accident. The only celebrities who strut around telling the world how great they are tend to be tragic reality-tv show contestants pissing away their five seconds of fame. Kanye got to where he is by being self-aware. He knows his celebrity points accumulate according to how many people are talking about him at any given moment and usually it's a hell of a lot because he's always sounding like a total asshole. People love it. I certainly do. I love hating celebrities for being arrogant dicks. I love complaining about how obnoxious and talentless they are because really I'm secretly bitter about their fame, their fortune, and the apparent ease of their existence.

Kevin Mazur The truth is, really successful people get there by spending every second working tirelessly towards their goal while the rest of us are sitting around binge-watching Netflix. It's not easy to stay relevant in our attention-deficit society and when your entire career hinges on attention, the best way to attract it is through sheer obnoxiousness. A perfect example is Kanye's significant other, Kim Kardashian. Is she some spoilt dumbass who stumbled upon extraordinary success by sheer luck or a canny entrepreneur who built a global empire by playing a part? She stole Paris Hilton's "dumb girl with a sex tape" act and turned it into a powerful brand that has found runaway success in fashion, retail, television, gaming and even literature. Her fame rests entirely on her shoulders, not her oversized ass. Kanye and Kim are two of the most successful people on this planet and it's all down to their ability to manipulate the consumers who love to hate them. So maybe Kanye is a genius. A marketing genius. The airhead and the arrogant dick have played us all for fools. By my account, they've earned every right to name their kid after a direction.